Boy oh boy. Have the golden globes got you salivating buckets full or what? Men across the globe, sitting jaw-dropped, distracted and in a state of wishful fantasy glued to their telles. Injustice! I find it sheer injustice for the rest of us women. I mean what kind of pressure do we mere mortals undergo when a 50 year old Jodie Foster has more gorgeous gams than a 30-something me (us-come on women, we're one on this)?!And seeing the husband get his tie all wrong every time the likes of Jennifer Lopez in her tease-of-a-dress swayed on my flat screen only made my curves feel gargantuan.
So the conversation goes like this.
Husband: Baby, these women age so well. I mean look at Jennifer Garner (Why couldn't my parents name me Jennifer? May be i would also turn out in the ranks of Jennifer Lopez, Jennifer Garner, Jennifer Lawrence?) She's a mother of 3. Look at her arms and her buff torso.
Me: Yeah. (THOUGHT BUBBLE: But baby, she also has the luxury of having a butler, chauffeur, fitness trainer, yoga instructor and therapist at her disposal 24-7. She also has amazing caucasian genes that do not store fat like my sedated Indian genes. She also played a lot of sports as a kid unlike me, who sat on a swing when it was play time.)
Husband: Wow, look at Jodi Foster. OMG! Just look at her. Who would say she's 50?! Ha? Baby, if they can look like that, i mean what's stopping us? (Us as in Indians) Why do we age so poorly?
Me: Yeah, you're right baby. (Because perhaps they are allowed to do whatever their heart desires without gun point deadlines of marriage by 21 and 2 babies by 25 with a PHD in medical engineering and a $100K salary so you can send dollars back home, all by 28? Maybe that freedom lessens their stress? And we all know by now, less stress=better aging.)
Husband: Should i bunk work today? This is really entertaining.
Me: ABSOLUTELY NOT. We can see the re runs in the evening. (Not a chance in hell)
So this is how my day went post the golden globe:
1 hour after husband unwillingly left for work- 1 hour gym work out.
Lunch: Mountain salad.
Mid day- Green Tea
Evening:- Toast with peanut butter
Dinner-Salad
Post Dinner:- Bag of chips and a toblerone. Sigh!
I guess i now know why Jodi Foster looks the way she does. It all boils down to will power.
Will start working on mine for the next golden globe.
Till then, enjoy your curves ladies!
